The power of Sisters In Yellow stunned me.
I could not read it quickly, for the pages dwelt inside me with increasing heaviness. As Hana told her story, my compassion for her grew such that I could hardly contain it.
Where do you go when you have no one to turn to? Hana seemed to begin with a color. Yellow, to be specific.
Yellow was how all this started. I met Kumiko, who had yellow in her name, and she was the first one who’s taught me about yellow bringing fortune, and that was how I was able to leave Higashimurayama and find my own place and my own life.
Hana’s mother has no capacity for parenting. She works at a bar, connecting with the men she finds there for brief interludes, leaving Hana on her own. Hana must be the responsible one in the family. So, it is easy for her to leave with Kimiko, a friend of her mother’s, in search of a better home.
Kimiko and Hana set up a bar, which Hana names Lemon, and soon they have more money than Hana has ever known. The new adults in her life, Kimiko and her friends, show her ways to survive that make her feel she is thriving. Until the mounting dangers, and fear, show her that her life is really crumbling.
The despair that Hana feels is heart wrenching. What does she have? No career, no family ID, no education.
How do people go on living? People I passed on the street, people reading newspapers in the cafes or drinking booze in the izakaya, eating ramen, going out with friends to make memories, people coming from somewhere, going elsewhere, laughing, raging, crying, people who live for today and would wake up and do the same tomorrow. How did they do it? I knew they had honest jobs, earned honest money. But embarrassed I didn’t understand was how they’d first obtained the qualifications to live within that honesty. How had they made it to that side? I wanted someone to tell me. My nights were sleepless, filled with worry, tossing and turning, and my thoughts grew distorted, so much so that I almost called my mother.
But, Hana’s mother can’t help her. And when Hana’s friends suggest that Kimiko and the other adults in their circle, have taken advantage of her, Hana cannot help but feel betrayed.
I’d always believed Kimiko had saved me. And the more I got to know her, the more I became convinced that she couldn’t live without me either, that there was no other way. That was why I’d been so desperate. But, I was wrong…
This is the crux of the novel, I believe. Did Kimiko take advantage of Hana? Or, as one of my principals said when I expressed disgust over a parent’s behavior, was she simply doing the best that she could? What ultimately matters is how Hana faces the reality of her life. She cannot answer for how she has been treated; she can only answer for how she will, in turn, treat others.
As we all, one day, will do.
